I just got the email below…very flattering, and makes me want to get back here and add to the archive…thanks to all my readers…

 

Chris,

I was watching this movie, you know the kind, spellbinding…breath-holding, teeth doing that rub together thing, okay wait, it wasn’t a movie, it’s your blog.

I fell in this hole and limped around, date-entry to date-entry, and I couldn’t find my way out. I’m not sure I wanted an exit, maybe just a gasp of air after going down the third or fourth time. (more like thirty-seven) Did you hear that?

Submerged.

I’ve laughed outloud, felt the hairs raise (now that only lasted for a short mini-second), pondered, wondered, fought off researching what you touted, but couldn’t find the exit to end the ever-growing maze of entertainment, education and laughing my ass off.

I think I enjoyed your blog.

I’ll return soon and dive back into the archieves, but for now I need to toss a few words on the page and at at least try to convince myself I’m writing the next blockbuster.

…AND the site was down for a day there.  If you were looking for an ebook or dvd set, please come back.  

Hope to post more soon!

…let alone BLOG.

But, Chris loves you.

Two misfit altar boys discover that with holy water and communion wafers they can form a nice sculpting paste…when a new truckload’s delivered, they go a little wild building a lifesize homunculus…and when they accidentally spill communion wine on it…LIGHTNING…and you guessed it…

…JESUS IS BACK!

…but this time he’s…ADJECTIVE!

Shorter version:

Two Screw-Up Altar Boys resurrect Christ from their Church Communion Wafers…hilarity ensues.  

Maybe they use their Jesus Monster to battle their local pedophile priest?  

Flavin.  Frink.

Isn’t that good, but there are some really good laughs in it.  And you can tell it must be fun to hang out on that set.  Best joke:

“I’ve got Penthouse, Hustler and Playboy from the 70s, 80s and 90s.  It’s like masturbating in a time machine.”

 

 

Hey Gang,

This question from a fellow screenwriter:

“I got a letter from a production company that read my script. From the letter, my skeptical side thinks I am going to call and have someone try to sell me script notes. But I also feel they may want to explore a rewrite before committing to anything. What’s your take on this?”  

Chris says:

It’s good to be skeptical, but there’s no need to conclude anything now — you can get in touch and find out.

If they do try to sell you some notes, you can always decline…and I would probably counsel you to do so, if only over the “bait and switch”… …unless there’s a strong motivation to take them — like they want to show it to someone…though if that’s the case, the notes should be free, in my opinion.

If they want a free rewrite (another likely possibility), I’d do it IF:

A. I felt like the notes actually improved the script, that is, I agreed with them — and I’d own the rights to a better project when I was done. Keeping it clear all along that I retained the rights to all drafts of the script. AND…

B. Weighing what the benefits are of doing the rewrite w/this question — what are they going to do w/the rewrite when it’s done?

You’re perfectly w/in your rights to ask: “And if I can get you a great draft, then what happens?”…

So you’re right to be skeptical, but innocent till proven guilty, and even if they ARE trying to sell you notes, it doesn’t make them bad guys necessarily –plenty of legitimate outfits do that — though I do distrust them if they’re posing as a legitimate production company and mainly making their money selling notes… …if you’re going to pay for notes, go somewhere without such a pretense, I’d say.

One quarter BILLION, worldwide.  And $18.50 of that is mine…

…and it’s a mess.

But I suppose that doesn’t matter anymore, right?  

Parts of it are good, ok, but, it’s episodic as heck.  There’s like 7 movies in there, and they don’t add up to one strong one.

argh.

Silly but fun.  

 

Empty, but…enjoyable.  

Like a really good diet soda.  

But a Loom God????

That might be a little much.  And sure, WANTED.  But what about NEEDED?  Am I right, fellow screenwriters?

About a year ago, you would have read me touting 800 FREE 411 here on the blog.

Forget them.  It went south, they stink now.  Before, if their voice recognition didn’t work you were taken to a live operator, eventually.  Not anymore, now you’re disconnected.  It was ad-driven and still is, but before, there weren’t so many advertisers.  NOW…they’re choked w/them and even when you don’t hear numbers, you get about three ads.  

Failure rate:  about 80%.  That’s right, when I call for a number I’m disconnected 3/4 of the time w/out getting it.  b4, I’d get shunted to a live operator.  

They are dead to me.  

Alive to me:

800 GOOG 411 — from Google.  Voice recognition has worked every time I’ve used it.  No ads.  NO ADS, ever, nor, am I told, will there ever be.  

AND…

…they connect you directly to the number.  Great when you’re driving…now, maybe I like to actually HAVE the number for later, and they don’t give it to you as a matter of course, but you have the option to get it…or they will text it to your phone.  Good.  And free.  

Google.  I think they do something else on the internets too.

There, I said it and I’m proud.